Dealing with Siblings

Have you ever been so mad with one of your siblings that without even thinking you wish for that brief moment to be an only child? Sharing a space with someone else isn’t always easy and problems are bound to arise for a variety of reasons! You may be upset because you have to share clothes, the TV, the car or even your room. You might dislike the fact they might get “special treatment” because they are older or younger than you. Whatever the issue may be, fighting with siblings is actually a very common thing and learning how to deal with the problems that you face can help you have a better relationship with them.

Challenges – Same Roots, Different Personalities
One of the reasons that most siblings fight is the fact that even thought they are related, with the same parents and same upbringing, they are in fact completely different people. People with different ideas, different tastes and different personalities, and these will end up crashing at times.

Problems between siblings can be a million. You may get mad because they take your things, because they don’t help with chores, or because they don’t treat you fairly. Yet siblings don’t have to be enemies, in fact, they can be great life long friends. Remember that they know what it’s like to grow up the same way you did, and that they have shared many experiences with you, and they can be of great support because of this, even when having completely different personalities.

Many times problems arise because of the difference between the ages of each sibling. Some siblings may take sides with each other for particular reasons or simply because they are closer in age.

One of the things that Isabel Medina, 24, dislikes about her siblings, both male and females, is the way they treat her because she is the youngest of four. ” They feel that because I am the youngest, I can’t give my opinion or I am not wise enough or have enough experience to give an opinion,” said Isabel. Being the youngest child is tough and Isabel shares that sometimes conversations get heated and they speak to each other in a loud voice. This is where their father interferes.

Joys of Having Siblings

They Will Always Be There
We get happy with each other by apologizing when it is necessary or simply acting like if nothing happened,” said Isabel. “I love knowing that, whatever happens, whatever things we tell each or how many times we argue with each other, they will always be there.”

The Good Outweighs the Bad
Elii Lozano, 22, explains that one of the reasons why her sister, now 25, and her used to fight was the fact that she tended to be a bit disorganized, and sharing a bedroom, this often caused problems with her sister who would get stressed because it. Yet even thought this would create fights between them, they never stayed mad at each other for more than two hours and would soon be like if nothing ever happened. ” Most of the time she would take the initiative,” said Elii. “Even though sometimes we fight for dumb reason, the good things weight more than the bad, we help each other and support each other.”

Take Care of Each Other
Like Isabel mentioned earlier, the love they all have for their father is perhaps their strongest bond, and when their mother passed away when she was only 4, she says her older siblings took the job of taking care of her and their home on top of going to school, and for this she admires them.

Best Friends
Not only can brothers and sisters be great role models but also best friends.  Mabel, 22, says she can’t imagine her life without her sister. “Our relationship is ideal, she is like my best friend, we are very close,” she shared. Mabel and her sister even have a day called “Sister Time” where they go out to concerts, to the movies or simply just enjoy movies at home. One rule…no one else is allowed.

Someone To Talk To
Marely Vega, 9, also enjoys having a 12 year old brother. She believes that having a brother is like having a friend at home that keeps you company and someone you can talk to. She advises siblings who do fight with each other to try to understand them. Right now they might fight but once they grow up they will understand them better, just like she read in a book about siblings. “If they were to ask me what a brother is I would tell them, it is a friend…they are like your friends, you can trust them aside from your mom and family. It feels nice to have a brother, to have company and if you have siblings, appreciate them, “said Marely.

Unique Bond
In the end, it doesn’t really matter how different you are from your siblings or how far apart in age. Understanding that these differences don’t have to keep you apart can even give you a best friend or  role model that you will always have no matter what. This doesn’t mean that you won’t have any problems with them. When this is the case, spending a few hours apart or apologizing can solve those small problems that may occur. Yet that bond and understanding that exists between you, is irreplaceable. Remember, not everyone gets to have siblings and it is truly a gift from life. It is an unconditional love.

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