Girl Talk: Loving Those Who are in Love

JD-art-teenlove-20121229175333558035-300x0Valentine’s Day is far away, yes, but let’s take some time to talk about couples and the growing habit of people’s negativity against couples. Some people will groan, gag, or poke fun when a gooey-eyed girl talks about how her boyfriend gave her flowers, or at other romantic stories like that. Admit it, we all know someone who does this, or maybe we are one of them ourselves — someone who can’t sit through a romantic movie without making a snide comment or who maybe makes comments like how wrapped people get when they’re in a relationship.

The Negative Approach

Though, granted, these cynics (“cynic” is defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary as “a person who has negative opinions about other people and about the things people do”) have their reasons. Maybe they just went through a hard relationship, maybe they got their heart broken, and maybe they’re scared. Maybe they’ve just never gotten to experience true love for themselves. And while these are valid reasons, there should still be more open-mindedness and encouragement of love.When did we stop celebrating love? When did we stop realizing how gorgeous and how sweet it is to see a girl swoon over flowers, an elderly couple walking hand-in-hand, or a man singing with a goofy smile on his face because he got engaged. This may sound cheesy and cliché, but love really is great.

Mackenzie Henson, 16, talks about love, saying, “Every time you think about that person, you smile and always want to hang out with them, you want what’s best for them and it just feels…wonderful.”

Loving those who are in love can give you hope, not jealousy

Even if you’ve never been in love, you should still feel happy for those who are. Love those who are in love, don’t be cynical towards them. Of course, as stated earlier, there are reasons for being cynical. We tend to make fun of others as a sort of self-defense against maybe feeling hurt, feeling lonely, or against showing vulnerability — after all, it is easier to look down on others than to feel down yourself.

As Lydia Strickland, 16, says, “Watching people in love is like sitting outside a pen of puppies. They frolic and play, have fun and love, while you watch on the outside of the iron bars thinking to yourself.”

For those who share the same thoughts as Lydia, keep in mind that watching others in love is not cause for jealousy, for self-pity, or for loneliness. Shouldn’t it be something of hope? Your time will come; one day you’ll stumble upon that kind of happy, glowing love, so there is no need to rush or torture yourself with self-pity.

Tai Goodwin, a speaker, coach, and brilliant catalyst, writes in an article in the Huffington Post,“When you see another person’s win as a loss for you, you pave the way for discouragement and resentment to set in. Instead allow other people’s success to ignite hope for the success coming in your time of harvest.”

Sharing is caring—and loving

Rather than ride the negativity train, share in your friends’ happiness! Realize the importance of love—the visible, engulfing kind of love that leaves people grinning goofily for days, the kind of love that makes others glow.

Hannah Young, 15, says she “realized that it’s actually cute and nice to see people in love.”

“I don’t feel bad for myself anymore. I try not to let myself get jealous either, because I know that love make you happy and everyone deserves that,” says Hannah.

When your friend talks happily about her date for the 100th time, you should listen just as attentively as you did the first time. When you see a couple kiss (though it might be overdone), smile! Because it really is sweet.

“When I first went out with my boyfriend, I wouldn’t stop talking about it with my friends,” says Mariana de Caro, 18.

“I bet it must have gotten annoying, but I needed to tell someone and I really appreciated it when my friends (I’m thinking of one specific friend, but I won’t say her name!) took the time to listen to my ramblings. They were attentive and supporting, and it made me all the happier,” adds Mariana.

You should remember that while you certainly don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy, you should still strive to smile for the happiness of those who are in one. It may not always be easy, but love shouldn’t be underestimated—enjoy it!

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