Boyfriend Advice: Letting Go

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Preguntale a Julianna

Question:

Dear Latinitas, I was in a very stressful and unhealthy relationship for about a year and it was really my first serious boyfriend. We would do everything with each other, he would come on my family vacations, and my mom even got him a job in her office, where he still works today. I have talked about it with my family and friends and I fully understand that it was a very good decision to end things with him. He was very controlling, no goals in life, party guy, and a compulsive liar. Months and months have passed now and I just got a new boyfriend. He is the complete opposite, comes from a good well to do family, the most kind and caring person I have ever met and has huge career goals. Let’s just say he’s the perfect guy for me, no drama. The funny thing is that I sometimes miss the ex. I know that I’ll never go back to someone like that, but is it wrong to miss him?

Advice:

Dear Friend,

I have heard of many stories just like yours, where boyfriends and sometimes girlfriends too, are controlling and at times violent. Unfortunately, the person being controlled or abused are too afraid to put a stop0 to it. I am glad that you got out of your relationship and that you have family and friends to support you. I am also glad that you found someone new who treats you right. You are very lucky to have found someone like your current boyfriend, there aren’t many guys like that out there these days. I think that you find yourself missing you ex boyfriend because of all the memories you two share. You mentioned that you two would do everything together so it seems logical that you miss him, as long as your missing him doesn’t interfere with your current relationship. No boyfriend wants to know that their girlfriend is missing another guy, especially and ex boyfriend. It is hard to forget your first love, especially with all the time you spent together. The good thing is that you know you don’t want the kind of relationship you had with him. It’s important that you know what you want and that you find someone who shares similar interests, which I think you have already found. Good luck!

Best wishes,

Julianna

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