One day your wish comes true: He talks to you and thinks you are pretty awesome. But, the hard part, what about your friend who likes him just as much as you do? Or reverse it, he talks to your friend and thinks she is the best girl ever. How would that make you feel? Would you still want to be friends with her? What would you two do?
Well, here is the best answer: drop him! No real girlfriends should ever, ever fight over a guy! University of the Incarnate Word freshmen, Brigitte Prunty, says it’s important NOT to fight over a guy because “you never know if he’s worth it. Your friends are way more important.” Your friends have been with you during your ups and downs and truly love you for the great girl you are, and a guy shouldn’t stand in the way of a friendship.
“Both friends need to get over him. If both are genuine friends, they wouldn’t break a friendship over some guy. They would get over him and move on with their lives with each other in it. That’s what matters most,” says Leia Hill, a junior at University of the Incarnate Word.
Advice from One Girl to Another
Both Leia and Brigitte agree that a boy is not worth losing a friend. Brigitte also knows how it is to be in this sticky, tough situation, since she has unfortunately experienced boy drama with a friend.A really close friend of Brigitte liked this one guy a lot. Even though Brigitte thought he was really cute, she wasn’t him into him that much, especially since she knew her friend was so into him. But, that didn’t keep this guy from liking Brigitte. After Brigitte’s friend found out this guy liked Brigitte and not her, Brigitte says, ”My situation was not fun at all.”
Of course, this caused Brigitte’s friend to become angry, and somewhat jealous. Brigitte apologized and insisted she did not want this at all. After giving her friend some space and time to think, Brigitte’s friend came around and they made up! Brigitte says, “Do the best you always can as being a good friend. Don’t give up on the situation– there is always a solution.”
“Every single relationship needs its ups and downs to be able to grow and prosper into the best, strongest relationship it can be. Which is why it is okay to have a rut happen in the relationship, just as long as both friends are smart enough to pass this rut,” Leia says.
In a situation like this, make sure to set boundaries. Any guy your friend may be interested in and you’re not into, is only a friend and that you’re not into him. Simple. It is totally natural for your friend to get her feelings hurt and be upset if a guy she likes ends up liking you. Give her space and keep reassuring her; she will come around!
Just as you and your friends cherish each other so much, thinking the guy you’re into will replace your friends may not work out the way you expect it to. There could be a day where you are feeling really sad and just need to talk and cry it out, and you go to him for emotional support. But, he sees you crying and thinks to himself: “this is not what I signed up for.” Always remember if this guy is a good guy, he wouldn’t dare break a friendship between two close girlfriends.The cute guy you thought was the love of your life may not stick around, but a true friend always will.
Friendships include arguments and hard work in order to sustain the wonderful bonds they have.Girlfriends are valuable treasures and the genuine treasures last a lifetime!
“After both friends have moved on with their lives and forgotten the crazy circumstances they were in, when they look back in their time together, they will laugh with each other and remember the (now little) arguments, and can both say ’we got over this.’ It made them the friends they are today,” says Leia.
It’s always exciting when you like a new guy, but it isn’t exciting when you lose a friend because of a guy. Make it fair for the both of you and just remember a friendship comes before a dating relationship. You and your gal pal need to always have good communication when you feel like something may hurt your friendship. If both of you like him, avoid competing for his attentions. It’s not healthy for you or your friendship. Talk with your friend about what’s fair for both of you, and for both of you to find someone else to crush on.